Familial Bonds As a Powerful Form of Self-Care… It Works!

We are family!  I got all my sisters and brother with me!  LOL, ok, I’m talking about my immediate family here.  My siblings, my crew, my self,  divided into 3 others.  My siblings and I have created a new tradition in our adult years where we take time for a short summer getaway together.  Unbeknownst to us, this getaway was something we craved.  Our familial bonds are that important.

What I’ve come to learn is that we all have that need for familial bonding.  Familial bonds are strong connections between family members.  Keep in mind I stated we all have a need for familial bonds.  I did not say we all experience them.  Sadly, this is a reality that I have come to realize the older I get.  When I tell friends about my relationship with my siblings, a lot of them are shocked that we get along.  Really.  I had no idea how much of a blessing it is to have the bond that we share.

I honestly thought this was typical sibling behavior, but I am learning that as with ANY relationship, sibling relationships require work, compassion, honesty, and tending to.

My siblings and I have always been close.  I think it’s because we didn’t have anyone else to really spend time with besides each other.  Our mom is/was very protective of her chicks, lol.  So spending time with anyone that wasn’t family was few and far between.  As a child, I thought that was so horrible, but as an adult, I see how that helped us nurture a bond that can’t be broken.

My siblings have seen me through my best and worst times.  They are always there to support me, lift me up, embrace my dreams as their own, and keep me humble.  We do that for each other.  My dad used to stress that “Family is ALL you’ve got!”  We took that oath to heart and no matter what, we are always the safety net the other needs.

[ctt template=”4″ link=”J7Dri” via=”yes” ]”Family is ALL you got!”[/ctt]

The importance of our bond became clear when my brother posted in our group chat that we needed to push up our annual getaway date because he “needs it”.  At that moment, we all commented that we too needed this time together and had been looking forward to it since the last one.  It immediately became apparent that when we are together, we are able to drop all the stress, burdens, and tension of our adult lives and be free kids again.  At least, seemingly, we’d be kids again.  We would share that free feeling with no cares that we grew up with.

After all, when we are together we don’t have a care in the world.

Now, when I meet people with strained familial relationships, I encourage them to nurture those relationships.  Why?  Because it just does something for you in a way that I can’t fully explain.  It’s crazy how we can be so cordial, forgiving, and understanding with people that are not our blood but yet we struggle with those family irritations and frustrations.  As I stated before, it’s important to nurture a familial relationship just as much if not more than other relationships.

Here are just a few of the ways my familial bonds have proven to be a powerful source for self-care:

1. Your family knows your faults!  They’ve seen it all.  So no matter how bad you think you are, you’ll never be too bad that your family can’t still love you.  Sure, they may not agree or be happy about some of the things you do.  But my squad has always loved me through my “moods”.  They know this Cancerian is just being a Cancer.  The thing about this is that you have to understand each other and accept what you learn.  You can not be in a rush to change them to be more like you.  This is how you get friction in the relationship.  Just how my fam knows when to back off during my “moods”, they don’t take it personally when they back off.  They just come running with open arms when the “mood” is over.
2. We share the burdens.  When I go through stressful situations, I can count on my siblings to step in and help carry the burden.  I’ve seen them step in and take the burden right off of my shoulders to divide amongst themselves.  There is a true peace that comes from knowing that when I face adversity, I don’t come as one… I come as four!  Wow!  That’s powerful!  Each one of us has a different personality.  Which means we are able to carry the burden in different ways.  In our bunch, we have someone that will comfort, someone that springs into action, someone that protects, and someone that will make you laugh.
3. They’re my “Amen Corner”.  As stated in point number one, my siblings have seen it all.  They’ve seen me at my highest and at my lowest.  They never forget that highest point and willingly step in to remind me who I am whenever I need it (and also when I don’t).  They are the best cheerleaders always ready to support, push, and celebrate our successes.  That’s right… OUR.  When one of us wins, we all win.  This understanding of working as a unit is probably the reason why I am that way with all women.  When I celebrate anyone I call a “sister”, that is a true and genuine moment of celebration for us.

I am not oblivious to the fact that there are families out there struggling to get along.  So I offer this to you.  Make the effort to create some form of bond with your family.  It’s important to do so.  Can you live life without family?  Yes.  But I know first-hand that having the family bond I have has benefited me greatly as I move about the world.  My family is my place of refuge and I am happy to have a bond such as that.